Yes, I am still alive

Ok, the countdown is on for the homecoming of Linda & Ken. While they are busy sight-seeing, I am trying to not bang my head into the wall. The people around me have been so nice though! Kirstynn is always calling me to meet up with her. Dana has taken Polly out for a few trips. My neighbor, Polly M, has come over twice so I could jog outside! I am lucky and blessed. It is hard not having Mattson here to help me. Being a single mom is not easy...especially with the third child I have to care for.



So tonight, I had Ky and Marley in the tub together. Earlier I had put up a new smoke detector, so I had left out two screwdrivers and a hammer on the bathroom counter (stupid, I know). I was in the room with the bathtub watching the kids play when I overheard Grandma in the other part of the bathroom. I opened the door to check it out and panicked! OMGosh! The whole thing was disturbing and frightening! She had just put red lipstick all over her teeth...and it also was all over the bathroom counter, the white towels, and her hands. She had the phillips screwdriver shoved in her mouth because she was "picking something out of her teeth." At first glance, it looked like blood...not lipstick. Wow. The whole scene made my heart stop. Thank goodness she was ok, and I didn't have to call Mom and have her come rescue me asap!



My time alone with the kids and Polly has been adventurous, to say the least. I have spent alot of time on my knees, praying for the strength to get through another hour of it(sometimes I take it one hour at a time). The support of my family and friends is the only way I have survived! Even with that help, it still sucks sometimes. I miss Matt so much. Being alone at night is not cool. I miss having my best friend there with me, stepping in when he knows I need help.



Ok, that was a fun therapy session! On a better note, here is a picture of the "fruit of my labor." The corn was so cool to grow! I want to do it again next year for sure. I did pick about 10 ears/husks? too early...so I had to throw out quite a bit. But the ones we did cook and eat were so yummy! Growing your own food is dope! Ky loves to help usually, but there were quite a few bugs on the corn, so he was freaked out by the end of it. Notice his face in the picture, he was creeped out and did not want to get near the corn or the wheelbarrow...pansy. Oh well! Thanks for all your love and support (seriously). I love you all!!!!